I am depressed…throws away 40 cupcakes!

I would just like to say, I experienced such a terrible sensation when my mom started to throw away 40 cupcakes in the trash after we closed for the day. I never thought she would throw away so many. She made them today, but she never keeps them because they get a little dry the next day. They have a shelf-life of 48 hours. I believe she could have done something with those cupcakes. I think it’s terrible that she threw them all away. She kept 12 of them for us.  I mean, maybe it’s not all that bad. The ingredients in a cupcake, not including the icing and the filling, is sugar, flour, and vanilla or chocolate extract, depending on the flavor. Those food items are common to find, so maybe it’s not all that bad. I have a confession to make though. A few days ago, I started to place cupcakes in the forest in my back yard. I had a vanilla cupcake and a green velvet cupcake in my hand and I threw 2 of them, and I threw them hard, like a catapult. My mom didn’t have red dye at the time she made the cupcake so she used blue dye instead. The cupcake turned green only because she didn’t use enough dye. I forgot where I threw them at, but when I came back from school, I went back to check, and I couldn’t find them anywhere. I was there for 10 minutes looking for them. About 2 days later, I decided to place a vanilla cupcake in the grass at the edge of the forest. It was still there 4 hours later. I didn’t want my mom or anybody else to know I was doing this, so I grabbed it, which had ants all over it, and I placed it behind a small vine bush. The next day, I came back, and it was GONE! It was really gone! The icing was even gone too. I couldn’t believe it. I am guessing that a bird might have eaten it. What kind of wild bird eats cupcakes? Perhaps it was a crow, or maybe a European Starling, since those birds are common in urban areas. I do live in a rural area, but for some strange reason, their eating habits seem similar to what they have in their city life. I don’t get it! Their diet seems to be so ranged with insects and stuff that I wouldn’t even think they would eat something like that. However, the cupcake was infested with ants when I last checked. Maybe that bird had no choice but to eat that cupcake. Maybe it only liked the taste of the ants. Regardless, it still managed to eat the cupcake and I am obsessed to keep putting cupcakes out. Maybe one day I’ll make a video through my webcam at my back window to prove it. It’s got to be a bird, it’s just got to. If it is, then I’m probably just going to kill myself. I just can’t stand knowing that a bird wouldn’t be satisfied enough. They just can’t be satisfied with just one cupcake. I would need to put more out, but then what if my mom finds out? Oh my gosh! What am I going to do? I’m sure a bird won’t be knocking at the door for more. Birds have foraging abilities, that’s what they do. That’s their job. I can’t stress all this enough. I really need to know everything, every single detail. Do you think I should keep putting cupcakes out? What happens if I put too much out? Nothing can possibly happen, right?

I need help, desperately! I really will kill myself if I can’t know all the right answers. Maybe I’ll get over this. What I am doing must be wrong, otherwise other people would be doing this. I am so depressed being exposed to this. I can’t stand any of this. I can’t even stand to work at my mom’s restaurant anymore. I just CAN’T!


About jhirzel88

I am majoring in college to be a computer programmer. My favorite food is Buffalo wings. My hobbies include bike riding, listening to the radio, and watching YouTube videos. I used to play piano and guitar. I got my first internet working computer (which is this laptop right here), in Novemeber, 2008. I hope to achieve the use of this blog in the best possible way I can. By the way, my favorite animal is the Amazon Parrot and I really want to get one in a few years down the road. Edit: I decided that I'm definitely getting a Raven as a pet, that is, after I finish college.
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4 Responses to I am depressed…throws away 40 cupcakes!

  1. ElizOF says:

    Please don’t beat yourself up over the cupcakes… perhaps she was in a hurry to make space for new items. Next time, you can suggest that she donate them to a local soup kitchen… A church will gladly take them off her hands too.
    I know from your comments that you love music. Does it help with your mood? I find that music gives me comfort and even makes me smile. If that doesn’t work, try a visit with a professional for counsel… Have you shared your concerns with your mom? Please do as she’d also be able to guide you. Don’t give in to the sadness… you can beat it. All will be well! 🙂

  2. jhirzel88 says:

    Oh I forgot to mention, a woman came into the shop asking for a donation but my mom told her that she had a lot to deal with already. She has already had 3 other companies ask for donations, one of which has asked for 200 cupcakes. She hasn’t heard from the winner that had the last contest that she donated cupcakes too. Hopefully, that person doesn’t come on a Saturday because that’s when she always sells out. She makes plenty of cupcakes and she does freeze them on the slow business days.

    No, music just makes it worse. I can’t listen to anything anymore. I can’t tell any of my family members of my situation. I want to tell my grandma about this but I am always busy working at the restaurant that I can’t even visit her to tell her. I’m sorry………….I just can’t live like this. There is too much sadness in the world. I hope I’ll be alright. Luckily I was able to sleep soundly last night.

    But then, what about the birds? I don’t know if a bird ate it? Maybe it was just rats, I hate rats. No, it had to be a bird. It couldn’t be any other animal. Also, I really want to know what the consequences of my actions are.

  3. Yes, I will feel bad too if I see those good cupcakes being thrown away. I had a buffet lunch today and I felt guilty for leaving an almost untouched plate of noodles. I thought about the hungry people and it made me feel sick . But that is how it is in America, we can’t reuse perishable items like food because someone may get food poisoning and then comes the lawsuit or complaint. I guess the lesson here is get only what you can eat. I hope to change next time. Great post. Gives everyone the chance to think about living within our means, of not wasting, of thinking of others. Have a wonderful weekend and best wishes to your family.

    • jhirzel88 says:

      That makes me feel so much better! You are right, you can’t reuse items like that, because it all just rots away anyways. Nothing’s going to change about that. My mom is trying hard to figure out how many of each flavor needs to be put out each day. She needs to make sure there’s plenty of cupcakes, otherwise she can’t make enough money. She needs to do that in order to pay the rent. She is getting better at it, but that’s going to take time. I mean, she’s only been in the food business for 4 weeks now. Thanks!

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